Thankfully the sinning has led to better discernment from the Holy Spirit and repentance. That is NOT to say, the sinning is helping - it is the repentance.
It seems like a cycle - clean my dirty hair (sins) - then find more dirt - clean some more (repent) - like the directions read,
"Lather - Rinse - Repeat."
My worry comes from asking myself, "is my soil rocks? Weedy? Or Good?" Am I
predestined for my heart to be in a patch of weeds, letting life's
worries get me down? Or can I change my dirt?
One troubling day, I went to my favoriate passage Matthew
11:28-30 and I read it a bit differently. Maybe by taking
Chirst's yoke means attaching a plow to the yoke and digging up the
weeds. Maybe his burden is continual work to become more Christ like
and empowered by His spirit, plowing under the weeds whenever they
spring up. Making bad soil into good where His seed of truth can grow.
I put these two passages together and I'm left with a resolve of faith and hope.
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